Thursday, August 31, 2006
" ; Thursday, August 31, 2006 "
31'08'06
someone said i m realli keen to noe who he likes...
bt to mi...
i now jus wanna forget everytings...
so...dun put words in my mouth...
when i m not means..i m not......
now i tink the best solution is to forget...
and concentrate on my studies...
although i noe is hard...
bt rmb...hang u wont give up...^__________^
haha....hang u wont yes give up in front of difficulties
danial said the more i try to forget the more i rmb...
may be is true...
i noe...
but i realli wad others gd solutions i shld take...
haha....
feel beat now after readin it all out...
u may c i look nth in skl
but deep in my heart...under the mask...i dun noe what i m tinking....
lets jus let the god decide...i believe in him...i noe...
somehow there are ways....to solve it
haix............................T^T
todae went back to primary skl ...
actualii not feel like gng ...
but i went also...
nth much...i could jus feel bored....haha....
many teachers were not ther...so i find myself walkin around....
n dng nth...my frn all not ther...so at 3 plus i went hm alone...then cried again...hee
before that we hav the annual cross country....
drenched all the way
coz rainnin
haha...fun in deed
hahehehehahe...now realli gtg...
so frns...bb
---------------hang u-------------
" ; Thursday, August 31, 2006 "
31'08'06
sorry if i actualli wrote somethings disappointin to u all....
not feeling well now...with red and swollen eyes...i would like to continue ...
veri down now...realli sad...and heartbroken...feel like dying...
i m realli tired..is ther a place i could jus stop n sit down n jus doze off..n die..
can god jus send mi home to where he is ...bt i noe i cant...
coz i promised myself not to do those stewpid things....and i noe i wont....
bt this is how i felt now...the heart is full of holes of blood drippin down....
the pain in heart..noone noes...like broke into million of pieces...
i feel helpless and lost man...
my heart is empty...mind is empty....i m that stewpid all along...the dumbest person
....i realli take time to forget someone who u likes or love alot....
....i thought i realli forgotten him...may be i was bluff by myself too...
i thought being cheerful...puttin everyting away...puttin a mask on...
everyting will be fine...haha...ya...everyting is gettin all wired up...
and now i m lost in a maze where i couldnt find the exit....
....
ystrdae....someone jus told mi that he likes a gurl alrd...
bt the time i receive and look at the msg...
i was shocked and my mind was totally blank....
i sudden pain could jus be felt in my heart..u may say is fake de la...
no..is realli painfull...and i couldnt breathe probably...
then i noe sth more bt i didnt wan to tell here as i promised someone...
bt then...i jus keep on crying and cryin...
so..all along he doesnt like mi...
n...all along is mi the one who jus fall into him blindly thinkin tat may b he loves mi...
wtf...silly??
omg...?cant believe i m dng such things...
HANG U...!!!can u jus wake up...slapp urself...wtf...
daydreamin till think imaginery things...pls...
u r such a ugly little gurl that even a guy wans to ignore u....
haha...funny...realli funny...interesting huh...
gettin all so confuse by my self where he jus enjoyin his life ther...
wad's wrng wif mi....
"HANG U!!!!!!!!!!!!"
todae i tot i could do sth great to mark this dae...
haha...ten turn out to be i cryin non-stop...
omg...i tink i m siao le...shld send to mental hospital...lol
realli dun noe how...
i m sry to my frn that now i disappoint them and being sad...
todae when i went out of skl wif charmaine...
she said i look so lost and thinkin alot of things...
haha...ya...i now jus feel like crying more n more...
haix..i m tired loving that guy...i feel so weak now...
hah...have not seen myself being so depress over a guy before...
ya...y did i fall for him...i didnt noe y...
haix...if there is a time machin...i wan go back..to my memory hall...
and erase him...erase all the things wif him...so i can suffer less...
selfish...stewpid...stubborn....baka...i dun noe...wat i should do...
i jus feel down n tired...
i tink i cannot love him forever...bt may be i could use lies to protect our memories...
bt now i tink i dun hav the ability to stand up n be strong....
i m sry to let my frns down...
if i could change everything...i would rather i nv live on tis world...
if i could jus free frm here...i would....
my wings are exhausted...they didnt wan to fly anymore...
hang u ....jus....jus...tired...
--------------hang u------------
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
" ; Wednesday, August 30, 2006 "
30'08'06
"I LURB U!!!!!!!!!"
HaHa....long ago wanted to scream this rite into his face...bt now i could onli do here...
aiya...blush....ahha...lol...feelin like huggin him sometimes...he is sick le...haix...hope god will let him recover...ahha....worried=[
haehehhehahehhaeheahaehehehhhaehehahehhehea..........
" ; Wednesday, August 30, 2006 "
30'08'06
gng to end august wif sth GREAT...??
haha..now is rainin...haha...so windy....jus feel like sleppin...bt need to blog....
haha...^^
sth realli STRANGE happened todae...
i was sittin beside weiping,a china student.....
jus imagine she onli toks to her frns n wont tok to others...kk??haha...
these few daes i became quite close to her...in a way that i actualli tok crap to her...
i wont tok craps to her in the past...haha...mi crazy le this few daes...
then she said that the guy besides him likes mi...which is true...he did woo mi b4...
i ask her...how u noe...she said she n her frn jus can c...
haha...lol..miracles...?!!haha...next she said that i was woo by lots lots of guys...
bt in this skl so far not one gets my true heart...lol...
amazing...strange...i m here to say i m pretty or wad...bt jus feel tats true...
haha...next she said....the guy in front of her loves mi alots...
i was shock n drop my jaws wide and stare at her...
omg!!!!is [h][i][m]....
how can it be...?i asked...she said frm some small things ...they jus could telll...
siao???haha...look...she doesnt tok to pple lots yet she noes so much...crazy...
haha...lol...
todae we hav teacher's day celebrations...
i supported all my frns...they ROTT man...oops sry is ROX
haha...gd performance althught lots were disorganized and confusin...
haha...realli hope those tchrs enjoy...haha...
by now is 5.45...rainin...i dun hav umbrella...cant go hm...
hahah...tmr i m gng back to my pri skl...haha...hope is not a raining dae...
haha....todae is the forth dae wif my sis not speaking to each other...
haha...sometimes may be we shld both cool down n reflects on what we done...
although i noe she wont...she onli tot i was in fault....lol..
got back the progress card...not realli satisfy wif those shitty marks...
although all my frn said veri gd le...
haix...seein some of my frn getting not veri gd result...i heart pain...
realli dun noe how to console them...
bt rmb..?i said nv give up...this is jus a paper...
is not to weightage ur future ur life...
so mus improve n work harder for the next one...
haix...those who realli need to buck up their socks...
pls dun jus say [air] words...pla do so...
somethings practice makes perfect...
although i sometimes dun agree....coz those shitty qn were damn hard...
sry if i offended anyone here...bt jus wan to say...
is not the end of the world...believe in tmr...
coz sunshine n hope is tmr...
let ur seeds strengthen n grow in the warmly sun shine,salty rain drops...
and ur hard works...let them grow n bloom into flowers...
so pls dun giv up!!!!!!
hang u is here to support always....=D
-----------BLackSTOnE-------------rott on
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
" ; Tuesday, August 29, 2006 "
29'08'06
is everyone will try their best to go back to their primary school to visit their tchrs..?
i will be gng..hah...quite excited to c them again ...lol...
haha...
....=)
have u guys tot of ending ur own life sometimes...??
haha...sry for asking....if i ask the wrng qn
hah...
i have tot of that...
i was thinkin if a person died...although onli suffering for that few mins pain...
bt lata...u will be release....
coz no more studies ...no more troubles...no more feelings...no more pain..
ya..thats wad i tot in primary school and sec one...
sometimes when i encounter difficulties...
i jus feel like endin my life...
coz ther is nth memorable for mi to live on....
jus tinkin why mus god send us down on earth when being a human is so hard...
being a human...u hav pain....
u have feelings....
u have troubles...
u need to do things u dun like to survive....
so....if wad if i dun wan to live...i woldnt have this stewpid things to frustrate on....
bt now....thinkin back...all these tots were childish n immature....
i did commit suicide before...
jus becoz of my god bro...we quarell like hell....
and i decided to end my life by crossin the heavy traffic road...w/o looking...
silly??
i noe...bt was under unconsciously...haha....
now i knew sth...no matter how bad ur life is ...
u still hav to carry on...coz is a test from god....
if u pass it...u wont need to dng it again the next time....
endin ur life may bring to lots of pple feelin down for u....
so...i still think being alive is the greatest thing on earth...
coz we r much more luckier than those who are unfortunate....
since those unfortunate pple still hav their strong decision on livin...
so why are we pple who live gd n better here wanted to end our life....
rite???
haha
so nv try to kill ourself...is the worst thing and stewpidest thing to do on earth....
live on n explore more things....
they are still waitin for u to find them....and dissapoint them...
haa...lol...quite a lame post....
-------------hang u------------
" ; Tuesday, August 29, 2006 "
29'08'06
SEp holidae coming...i decided to study for EOY...
haha...ya...sth happen in my family...bt i tink it will be fine...
haha...
these few daes...i jus wan to enjoy wif my frns...crazy wif them..they r jus so adorable...
haha...todae...i went hm earlier coz i have tuition at 3pm...
then i got on a bus and met two of the N/A frns...malay...
one of them was veri veri sad over frnship...so i sort of console her...in malay...
haha...unnoticingly...an old man bringin his granddaughter sat besides mi...
when the bus came to lakeside MRT station...lots of pple get in...
one lady wif her small kid were standin in front of mi...
and as the bus started its engine again..they started to swing un steadily...
so...i decided to giv my place to them...and the old man beside mi suddenly said sth...
:"god..!!lookin at ur dressin...didnt noe u r so kind..."
haha lol...i blush a bit and said thnx...
i tink all along he was lookin at mi in a different angle...
he tot i was some sort ah lian...
haha...then suddenly i opened my mouth for givin my place to the lady...
i tink he gt shock....haha...coz now adays pple esp youngsters hardly gave their sits...
haha...quite proud of myself ...
i came out wif sth as i was walking hm...
nowadaes...youngster have always concertrated on their future or their dreams or works...
they started to forget those minor things of consideration,courtesy...bah..bah...
they are thinkin those things r useless for their future so they decided not to follow....
bt have u ever tot of...jus givin example:
a veri clever man was busy studying for his final exam...
he is realli smart and could become a great man in the future...
BUT....he doesnt care about his rm...
his rm is damn shitty messy n full of rubbish...
his frn said:if u dun noe hoe to clean ur own rm...how r u gng to manage the country in the future....
...
is true...many things begins wif small things...
we must learn how to crawl before we learn how to walk...
so here is wad i wan to say...donot ignore those small things in life...
they might create great impact on u n others...
always go wif small little things...
before u actualli started to build our own castle...
sometimes...step by step is better than u jump rite straight into the centre
without gainin any experiences....
and always think of others n dun be SELFISH...
------------hang u------
Monday, August 28, 2006
" ; Monday, August 28, 2006 "
TOdaE iS MOnDaY!!!!!!!!!
MonDAe is A CRAZY DaE!!!
28'08'06
the nite before...
i quarell wif my sis...
she is really a BITCH!!!
haix....this coming sep holidae...mi mus stay at home and cannot go out le...T^T
i asked my sis whether she would spare one dae for mi out of the ten or more daes...
we can go out to relax...coz mi this three mths...nv went shoppin at all...coz she always find excuses for saying not gng out wif mi....WTF...
she said her exam is weighing on her so she dun wan give mi fault hopes...
haix...that nite i was damn angry coz my third bro ah kai keep fanning the fire on my head...
i was not that angry within she became bitchy like those u see in american shows...
then i ask her...so u still hav time to tok to frns for several hours...and watch tv...and play com...
so HOW HEAVY IS UR EXAM...???
she replied saying that isit i expected her to study like shit...and some stupid reasons...
then...ah kai came into the scene....he was damn bloody shit angry over wad she said...
so...being a two head snake...my bro started typin chinese to scold her back...
at that moment...i realized i did the wrng thing...
coz my bro critize her wif alot of things...bt those msgs were sent under my name...
haix...then after that nite...i realized...i shld not do tat...
this is the last yr of her and now we quarell again...
one thing...we can have this cold war of ignoring each other for more than 2 wks....
secondly...in this way..she wont feel bad n guilty....
bt i m the one who feels it...and always the one who started saying sry...
no matter what attitude she gave mi...for the past 5 yrs...i have been dng that...
my bro screamed at mi sayin that if she giv attitude ..shot her back...what to scare...
actaulli..i m not scared...jus dun wan to break our little sweet relationship...
bt sometimes her attitude was realii unbearable...
during june holidaes...she stole my magazine to read w/o asking
fine...if so...then don tell mi...bt..she told mi...
this made mi more angry as...she online bt she dun even bother to ask mi...
wtf...and she always expect mi to ask b4 taking her things...
bt she selfishly didnt...
now i dun even wan lend her things willing ...is kind of bad..i noe...
bt somehow deep in my heart i jus feel i shld treat her the same she treats mi...
bt another angel said that i shldnt coz i mus b generous...
haix...last tym i told her to share the cost of a hair equipment...she said dun wan...she wont use
so i bought myself...in the end..now she beg for mi to use the equip...
then i sort of say i tot u say u wont use..
then she will giv mi attitude sayin dun lend dun lend lo...
then started to kick things n scram...not happi...
then i unwillingly i lend to her...
now in my heart...
one angel is sayin...jus say sry then everyting will be set
evil will say dun always let her climb over ur head...expect her to apologize..she started first...
haix so confusin man...
i split out everything to my aunt...and she said my character is same as her...while hers is same as her mother....
she has ATTITUDE PROBLEM AND SELFISH...
while i m VERY SOFTHEARTED AND WANTED TO FORGIVE BUT CANT FORGET THE PAST...
problem problem....
now we didnt tok to each other....i feel awkard when seeing her...bt hard to open my mouth...
coz she will give attitude...and i have that enough...realli sick n tired of it....
haix...now dun noe how....for three mths not gng out...i m gng to die...
i cant go out wif frns coz my aunt sort of dun trua\st my frn well...n my aunt cant go wif mi coz she is busy preparin for the leave of my cousin to england....
--------hang u--------
Sunday, August 27, 2006
" ; Sunday, August 27, 2006 "
27'08'06
finally gets to online this late...
lots lots things happen ystrdae....
haix....i realli enjoy my life....
thinkin back all along my life was full of adventures....
although is not sth great as BIG FISH...
bt it seems that i have alrd walked for millions of years....
sometimes reali tink back does everything reali were unchangable...?
time realli pass by us damn fast...and now i ten notice then i wasted lots of them....
i oso miss a lot of opportunities...
on fridae...i went to my first stead de house to meet his papa...
pls donot twist our mind esle where....we r jus best frns...
last tym in sec 1, my ex-pri skl frns use to gather in his hse...and his father is so frnly...
may be bcoz...both of us also frm other countries...his father n mi loves chinese tea too...
thus,we chat alots...his father is a bussiness man so wont be always in sg...
therefore i rush to meet him when i heard that he is leavin on sundae...
his father is in his 60s'...
they lived near our skl...is quite a small n untidy house...lol..
i reached ther at 12.45...and his father made tea for mi...
haha....wonderful tea...
he was quite worri abt his son who now always came home late...
he is worry about his studies...not sure whether he could cope wif it...
he said he wished god can jus give mi more time...
and not have anything happen to him now...
coz he wanted to earn more $$ to support his childrean studies....
he although did not study much when he was young...
bt he said he was lucky enough to be successful in this situation...
he added on that he was tired but he have to move on....
he asked mi alot things abt his son...i think he really cres alot for his son...
haha...
sometimes...i jus tot my parents sending mi here to study is a MUST...
bt never tot that they actualli worked veri hard...
i didnt see how tuff they have to go tru...
bt somehow...now i could feel it...
i always tot i was forced to study here n it is my parents' decision...
bt now i learnt that they sacrisfy alot for mi ....
they shld be shakin legs n enjoyin their life rite this age...
bt jus bcoz of getting a better education for mi...
they need to work more and more years....
harder n harder....
i realli took everything granted...didnt know they actualli looked into my future...
they wan mi to have the best...have the most comfortable future...
arent they thoughtful...arent they great???
now lookin at them...
their black hair is turning into sliverish colour unknowningly...
their strong and active body actualli stared the lose energy...
i was so immature that i forgotten they r old le...
thinkin how many more time they could live...
will they be able to c mi graduate...married...havin children...
they realli gave their life to us...
they r tired....bt they gave mi everyting i wans....
thank you mom n dad for everything....u gave u teach mi...=]
sorry for being so disobedient sometimes...
ARIGATO!!!!!!!!!!
-------hang u-----------
Saturday, August 26, 2006
" ; Saturday, August 26, 2006 "
26'08'06
that dae...
he was sick...on thurs...
ahha....someone told mi....
i was hesitating whether to msg him..but mar said is ok de....
so i msg him"u sick ah?(...blah blah..)"
he didnt reply untill one hour later..."ya...why?"
then i sort of reply to tell him tc..and indirectly tellin him i oso sick...
haix..ten his reply jus "ya"...veri angry sia...
sometimes i realli feel like killing him....
cant u jus type someting longer...
does guys always think that avoid is the best thing....?
how can like tat sia...so immature...
avoid is realli a bad thing and a stewpidest thing to do...haix...
realli dun noe how to read guy's mind....
so complicated...
haha...
guess wad...i did bcome happier n not much troubles le....
bt jus deep deep in my heart...
still love him...haha...
that night i tot sth....
wad if i jus scream in to his face,telling him all i wan to say....
what will happen...
will it be like the ending of "which planet u frm"(is a korean show)
the guy in the show loves the gurl lots lots..
bt jus that he dun wan to stead wif her bcoz of some reasons...
he started to ignore her...and treating her is wall and invisible....
bt then the gurl tried her best to make frn wif him and tok to him...
even try to get opportunity to c him...
bt the guy turn out givin her attitude...haix...sad man...
then the gurl called him and cry and told him all she felt....
at last the guy "woke up''
then something link here link ther....
they both stay happily together.....
haha...pity the gurl...haha...
nah...not possible..sometimes things cannot be change jus that surroundin will change them...
and they jus need time...and more explanation to these weird and unbelievable things...
haha...MYSTERY....
haha....lol...
hang u is planning to concentrate on studies n sep holidaes is a wk of gd n best study time....
hang u rox...
FRIENDS ROTT
haha
-----------------HAnG u----
" ; Saturday, August 26, 2006 "
26'08'06
Suppose to be havin tuition now...
but notti hang u jus secretly online...
jus wanna to update blog
lol...
one memorable and happiest things...----i pass my inclined pull up----
haha...
WelComE tO HAngU's FAmOuS TAles....jus kiddin
well...
do u guys wish upon the next best things or archievements....
someone ask u which is ur best result or marks u hav...?
wad will u answer...?
haha....
u shld answer the next one....
the next one...
means that u nv think ur archievement is the best...
u should go for the next one...
coz u r gng to get better n better for the next one...=D
the next one will be the latest [Best] ....
we shld not stop gng for the best....we mus continue...
coz ur life haven end..
thats y....pple will still overtake u...
so when u start falling...u shld noe the next one u mus puck up....
this will lead to ur great success...
lol...haa...so hang u is here to say...pls do not say ur marks are lousy or gd...
is jus numbers to make u work hard...
strive for better and higher numbers....
and set a goal to get better the next one
[[[[THE NEXT ONE]]]],never say STOP!!!
--------Hang u----------
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
" ; Wednesday, August 23, 2006 "
23'08'06
my mother loves mi alot...
and i loves her lots too...
bt between us...there is always a wall...
this wall was built up when my mum l\dots on my little bro...
who always backstab mi n act innocent....
causin my mother w/o findin out who is in wrng...
scolded mi like blood hell...
frm those dae in the childhood....
my communication wif my mom bcame poor...
bt i noe deep in my heart i love her...
jus that she dun understand what i tink and i dun noe hers too..
that tym she was down wif some serious sickness....
i was realli worry...
ya...i did ...bt my bro didnt....
my mom is" blind"...she jus cant c how much i loves her...
and wad the truth side of my bro...
now...wheneva we tok...not exceedin five mins...we quarell...
then...not long ago...she went japn wif my dad...
she bought mi alot of bks on gothic n lolita,my favourite...
my mom's backbone was not gd,bt she insist helpin mi find for hours hours...
haix...can c she cares alot for mi...
bt jus sometyms...we cant communicated...
recently....my aunt told mi that my brother...
realli regretted that he did those things to mi last tym...
and he would like a new start wif mi...
bt i noe...he does...
bt sometimes...he is jus too outcast...none of the siblings likes him....
is jus like a piece of white paper...
if u painted it wif black...
is it possible to paint it back to the pure white at first?
no rite...i tink of this ystrdae nite...may be sometimes i shld jus forgive him...
and loves him more...
but it jus seem so hard and tuff...haix...
bt well...
step by step...hang u can do it...another stone encounterin...
quite a big one...lol...AZA Ganbande
---------hang U--------------------
" ; Wednesday, August 23, 2006 "
23'08'06
tell u guy sth...^^
i realli loves to be myself...thatcrazi hang u in skl...
then when i reach hm...i will tink n look back wad i hav done todae....
i will reflect on wad i hav done wrng....and wad mus be changed....
now i realize thinking is realli useful...altough sometimes...it makes mi down...
bt i loves it...coz...i help mi change my bad habits n mistake made...
jus like...sec one...?
actuaclly was realli bad gurl that time...i almost made myself bcome ah lian...
i almost did alot of things that are bad n unforgivable...i tried to commit suicide...
ya...those daes were realli mad n insane...
bt frm ther...sec 2...i decided to change...totally change...i dun like hang u actin tat way...
so...i tink n tink n share wif my frn...with firm determination...
and knowin wher goes wrng...
i success to change my bad habits...although in the process i hurt some pple feelings....
realli glad now that i dun offen scold vulgars,walk like gangster,speak like boyz....
so realli...
i think if u hav a bad habit...dun say is like tat de...cant change de la...
u haven even started...u put an fullstop to it...of coz it wont works...
give urself a chance...n give a chance to others to help u...
dun fight the war onli by urself...this is wad frns r for...to support n stand by u...
so fight on n get over those bad habits..
-----------hang u-------------
" ; Wednesday, August 23, 2006 "
23'08'06
is 23 todae...not realli a gd num...haha...
ystrdae...i lwas chattin wif my sista...we hug n cried again...
to mi...our situation r quite the same...sometimes...it jus seem like drama..fairytale...
she loves boy A but he loves Gurl B
then lata she loves BOy C...but he loves Gurl B...But Gurl C dun like him n jus flirt....
so...when she found out that Boy C was, nono,is all along liking that Gurl C...her heart breaks...
omg!!!...when i hear it...i was to shock to react then i cried oso...pretty lame...
bt my sis did not break down but she faced it although is heart breakin...
Bt look...to someone(my frn) who used to tell mi"nah..not fate la..not like that de la..he is not..."
n so n so ...Pls...sometimes things u must go face urself...is not u say is not then not...
is happenin rite ther...so how can u say is not...i realli dislike my tat frn when she start sayin nah...no la..no la...and tryin to blind herself or mi but the facts r ther...
haix...dun noe how to say la...
bt if it is mi...i will faced those difficulties and wont blind myself or wad so avoid...
ther are ups n downs in life....dun jus let one rocks to block the future of urs..which is bright n endless....^^
if fate makes ur life like tis...the jus be that way...no matter what result u get...u tried ur best...u did it..no regrets...then is all ok ....
-------------Hang u----------
" ; Wednesday, August 23, 2006 "
23'08'06
Kinochiwa....Hang u jus took a nap jus now...but still feelin veri slp...=[
i was realii touch when todae...marcus[sry to use ur name b4 askin ur permission]..
he came to mi n said seriously n couciling mi....
he is a realli cute n trustworthy guy...
ystrdae i post that i m stress up wif those marks n exams...
todae...he encouraged mi once again ...i was a bit too shock to react...
bt realli touch...hehe...didnt noe there were some much close frns by my side...
but i m jus too"blind" to realize it...
thinkin if i could have them much much earli in my life...that would b wonderful...
haha...bt thanks marcus..and all those frns...who always stood by mi...watchin mi...
encourage mi....=]
thanks alot....realli grateful...millions of thanks...
i promise...hang u wont give up....coz u all r ther for mi...^_________^
-------------Hang u---------
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
" ; Tuesday, August 22, 2006 "
BlackStonE roCks on____
22'08'06...
Let's dun tok abt sad things anymore....
sth great abt todae...
we had class photo taking...
well...
i was relli excited over it...
wow...
was realli great...no words can express my feelings...
haha...
guess wad...?!
i stood on 2nd roll n is rite in front of him...hehe...^^
happi?!nah...jus fun...
haha^^...
ystrdae...i prank called him wif my sis...
i tink he is veri shock that i called him...
my sis n my voice were the same tone in chinese....
not knowin whether he recognize the differences...
my sis spoke first...in a funny way...
"hELLOOOO....dng wad man...?
Free to tok??"
he reply after a few hesitation:''havin tuition now....sms?"
lol...then we crap around...
then i said"kkzzz...nvm fine..bb..."
du...du...
i hung the phone...
lol...was realii fun makin prank calls to him....
haha
then todae...
he tok to mi....
u noe HE TALK TO MI.....
Omg!!!!!!haha...lol...happi...HEHE...gd??
haha...
so happi man...
god!!!!haha
haha...
guys........i SUCSESS......i DID IT!!!!haha
lol
damn bloody shit hapii...
tnx alot....love ya........
-------------hang u rocks on-----------
Friday, August 18, 2006
" ; Friday, August 18, 2006 "
Love is oso powerful....
there was a mother who have cancer....
doctor said she wont live for more than one mth....
she was suffering frm pains and hardships....
all other patients in the wards cry like helll...
but she did not....
she endure all the pains....and said she is gng to attend her son's wedding
which was held the next mth...
so unexpectedly....
she lived till the dae her son successfully married....
she fulfilled her last dreams...
that night...
she closed her eyes...
smiled all the way...
and left peacefulli....
isnt that so powerful...
i found it so extraordinary....
yup...
love is strong energy which can pushes one to do sth...
bt pls dont use the love in wrng ways....
lol...
------------hang u ---------
" ; Friday, August 18, 2006 "
Haha....
18'08'06....
did u all know showing love is veri easy...?
haha...
jus read a passage...sayin that...
it was war time...and people were made to stand in rolls and shot....
a lady after being shot...
she falls weirdly....
and guess wad...
she is carrying a child in her in chest....
she protected her child from the bullets...
and not just that...
with the pain she had....
she bear the pain and fall down in a way that the child would not hurt....
this is greatful man...mother's love....
she wants her child to live on...and so she decided to sacrisify herself...
sometimes in live u wouldnt notice love is always there....
bt it is may be jus small deeds...
bt if it happens on u...
it feels totally different...
is warm and touchin....
speacially when ther is a danger...
u will realise who really loves & cares for u...
--------hang u---------
Thursday, August 17, 2006
" ; Thursday, August 17, 2006 "
17'08'06
i tink he also wanted to be frns wif mi todae....
if i m not wrng....
indirectly...some how we talked...
guess wad...
i will realli try my best to be frns...no veri close frn wif him again...
hope he will too...
hehe...
realli glad todae things are progressing.....
mus believe in tmr....
coz tmr is gng to be a sunny dae again...
so smile and cheer up...!!!!
hang u rox!!!!danial roTT!!!!
-----------HAng u ------
" ; Thursday, August 17, 2006 "
HaLO....!!!^_________^'''
Hang u has sTH to SAy!!!
17'08'06
do u guys have siblings???
haha...
i do have one....younger brother...but not realli good wif him...
Bt i have two good elder brothers and one lovely sista...
actualli the two bro were my aunt god son...ten my onli one sis is my cousin...
we all went for the same thing when we were young...
we came here to study...
we live under the same house...
the same rooftop...Lol
6 years together wif them...
we have great times together...
we have bad times too...
we changed alot during this six yrs...
my two bro were twin although they does not like alike...
the one who came out first was---ah wai
the one who came out after ah wai who kick him in his head so he could go out 1st--ah kai
both were veri notti and arrogant in the past....
Bt now they r kind n nice person...
may be the pple around them changed them...
haha....
ah wai is veri generous although we all find him havin attitude problem...
haha
while ah kai is veri talkative and suffer alot frm ah wai beating & scolding...
bt they both are realii gd pple....
i use to tell ah kai abt my problems and he will like my bro giving mi the bes advice...
they both veri funny...dun like mi callin them as brothers...as they said pai seh...
haha
my sis---loretta...
crazy as mi....
although sometimes i find her irritatin or attitude....
i still love her alot....
this year...
is lota's O level....
and her parents didnt wan her to stay in sg for further studies....
she wan her to go back american and study in university...
she is veri troubled and sad...
call so many years here...now say go back....is kinda hard...
tinking of that
1 more,2 more or 3 years....
four of us will be separate.....
this year lota is leaving....
next yr ah kai is leavin [may b]
now...
wheneva we do things together ...
i feel like crying...
coz...i noe one dae we wont do those things together again...
example...
last mth ...
my aunt bought a chocolate foundain machine....
although we kept eatin...we played hard...
then...
we made the whole living rm full of chocolates...
lol...
then my aunt fetch nathan home and she ordered us to clean up...
so...
we started to clean up...
is like one family doing hsechores....
washing dishes together...cleanin the dirty tables...play around with choco...
haha...
i realli feel like stopin the time and always stay as 15....
this yr...
i finally learnt to treasure my life...
i bought some hair styling equipments...
and my brothers will actualli play with them...
we shared comics together...
we ate midnight teabreak together...
we share troubles together...
we play gurl clothes together...(like my bro will wear our dress and skirts...)
is all so memorable...
whenever we are together...
i can just forget evryting...evrytings...
we are always happi and enjoyin ourselves though we are restricted by our aunt....
~~~~
jus tinkin...
when we were separated...
i know everyting will jus change...
we will lead our own life and start another fantasy again...
could it possible we can still keep in touch veri close....?
hope god can fulfill my dreams...
when one is gone....
four of us will not be the same anymore...
we need four crazies to do funky n crazy things...
hopin we gt be forever together which is impossible...
so now i will cherish...remember...every gd n bad times we had....
and do n say anyting we want to b4 we regrett...
-------------hang u -------loving her siblings...
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
" ; Wednesday, August 16, 2006 "
16'08'06
TOdae...
i decided that...
may be if i could say hi or wadeva to him...
we can process to frns agin...
hehe...
so in maths class...
i decided to pass my home work to him ....
but not to charmaine who sits on the next row...
haha...
i think i gave him a surprise...
may be i realli did...
haha...
bt gd thing he smile somehow...
hehe...
is this called successfully??
so...
i will continue and work hard to be frns wif him
support hang u??
gd idea...?
i mean i wouldnt wan to stay like this for the next two yrs...
i so cruel to both of us...
haha
so may be i take the first step...
hope he give mi a chance too...
---------Hang U------
" ; Wednesday, August 16, 2006 "
ToDae iS WEdnESdAe,GuIlTY DAe....T^T
16'08'06
Todae i went to the mrt station....
to buy sth to eat....^^
then...
when walkin out of the shop...
i saw a old couple...
standing at the lakeside busstop...
sharing a cup of ice milo or cofee...??
next...
the old man use his own hand n wiped off the milo or coffee
dirts on the side of the old lady mouth...
they both smile peacefully...
SO loVEly man...
thinking if my husband and i can do the same thing....
haha...
may be sometimes...
u r not rich...
bt u live a happi life with ur love ones...
may be that will be enough happiness alrd...
coz they r all besides u...
n the happiness is made by the love & warmth in people...
so...
if u grown up and...
onli rmb how to make more n more $$ to make ur life beta...
and forgot ur love ones...
please stop and turn back...
they needs u moree than the $$ u earn....
-------HangU--------
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
" ; Tuesday, August 15, 2006 "
15'08'06
if i m a part-time liar...
wouldnt that be good...?
i can put on a everlasting mask to cheat pple...
so..
i could hide all the feeling in my heart...
so noone will notice it..
haha...
so childish...m i??
ya...
i did wrote the ending of the story....
haha...
but may be still not so ready to go back yet ...
is a bit rush...
whenever mi n him get eye to eye...
i somehow could jus feel those sadness wrote on his heart....
haha...
m i silly...?still gettin hook over it...?
or may be i jus think too much...
haha...
May be i still need some time...
but i will be fine...trust me...
haha...
jus found out sth...
in my entire 15 yrs...
i onli like two guys...
one is my 1st stead...
2nd one is [he]
i just discover that...
last time...
my first stead loves (two &three)
the numbers...
so i always end my e-mail wif (two &three)
LoL...
dun noe whether is fate...
HE index no. also....(two &three)
lol...
i found it realli strange..
haha...
is not conincident...
is true...
many things with him...
r jus too linked together...
that sometimes...
i could not tell the reason...
AZA..AZA...
hAng u GanBanDe!!!!!...
haha...
if fate wants my life like this...
then i will face it...
coz is FATE....
---------hang u---------
bu
" ; Tuesday, August 15, 2006 "
Guess wad...
ToDae is TUesdae.....
15'08'06
Here to share sth b4 i kick on my story....
hehe...
if your loveones ask u if u will get the brightest and most precious star*
For them....
but it will cost your entire life....
what will u reply them...
.
.
.
.
mostly people doesnt wan the lovesone to be sad...
they will say of coz i will!!
.
.
.
but if it is mi...
i will say no...i wont...
bcoz...
i have to take care of myself so i can
listen to all the trouble he/she had...
lend a crying shoulder when he /she is feelin down....
accompany he/she to burn midnight oil studying...
to live a happy life with he/she...
to do things that arememorable
and not killin myself just bcoz of that star....
coz i tink that star will not do those things i will....
so ReAdERs...
will u get that star or not???
----------HangU----------
Monday, August 14, 2006
" ; Monday, August 14, 2006 "
14'08'06
Have you ever tot of treating ur grandparents good...??
yesterdae nite...
my sis and i were crying over this...
Strange??
may be u all wont understand...
we left our home when we were young...
then our relation wif parents not close...
can say they dun even understand us...
so we always quarell...
that nite..
my siblings and i was happily chatting in front of the door of my rm...
my sis and i took a glance over the dining table...
guess wad we saw...
our grandpa...
sitting ther alone...
all by himself...
eatin durian...
he looked so old n pale n sleepy...
tat time then we realized that...
we have always been so selfish...
we r so caged up wif our own world that we forget ones wif us.....
in the past my grandpa...
could jus walk around....
bath himself...
do wadeva him wans...
now...
he cant....
he wants bt the old body disable him...
ya...in the past we use to say hello or gd morning to him...
now we forgot the practice we use to do....
we all took things for granted n forgettin wher the hardships our ancestors been tru...
my grandpa he said...
he is tired....
he is useless ...
he dun wan to live....
i scaryin each one of us...
bt now then i noe...
his life is so boring....
everdae wake up,eat breakfast,listening to those repeatedly played cds,watchin tv,slp,then take bath(wif my maid help)...
i think if any o fus would live in this cant of situation...
we will die...
so...
FRIENDS...
if u r findin ur grandparents naggy,parents troublesome....
PLs Forgive them and CHERISH them...
one dae they wont be here to nag u again....
------------hangu-------
" ; Monday, August 14, 2006 "
Haha...Finally...
GOd settle all for me...
HEx....=]
mUs ThanKs my FRns aLot...
on the period of time...
they gave mi alot of encouragement...
thanks....
hehe
^__________^
love u alll!!!!<3
" ; Monday, August 14, 2006 "
^__________^
i settle those feelings le....
feel so great now!!!=]
haha...
12'08'06
At nite....
windy...?[can't rmb]
i type a msg to him to make an end to this endless story...
sayin to him i dun like him anymore and whatever he thought of mi,pls erase it....
i wouldnt wan to care anymore...
i told him not to reply as i wont wait for him anymore....
haha...
not sure whether is a rite choice anot...
bt i know...
if i continue like this....
i will also hurt those pple who cares n loves me....
so...
decided to end this drama....
haha
since he didnt have anything to say...
let it be...
now...
i jus feel released....
in the past....
i always thought those memories will him are realli precious..
that dae...
i feel that those are past....
now mus enjoy LIFE!!!!=](encouragement frm danial)
hhaa
lol...
GAME OVER!!!...
no more drama series...
no more tears....
I QUIT!!!
i will lead back my own life...
and...
he will stay in his restricted world....
---------HaNg U RoX!!!---------
Friday, August 11, 2006
" ; Friday, August 11, 2006 "
MAY BE I SHOULD JUS LEAVE IT ALL FOR THE GOD...
HE WILL DECIDE....
HE WILL HELP ME....
HE WONT LET ME DOWN....
" ; Friday, August 11, 2006 "
11'08'06
HEy GuyS?!
know what...
todae we went to jurong east regional library for a tour...[nah...for CIP]
13 or 15 of us...
...
we did book shelfing...
it was fun...
i mean...lookin at the numbers and simply jus put the books accordingly...
sometimes while shelving
[he] and i will meet...
but just dont know why he jus loves to advoid...
may be is me the one who think too much....
may be is just conincident....
haha...
i really tot we could be [frn] as he said...
but things wont work when two hands doesnt clap...
i am the one who is trying hard to reach for his hands...
but he is jus way too far...
haix....
FriEnDs???
i dun get it...
what is the definition of frns??
Lol...
like strangers advoiding each other and try not to talk to each other??
is that wad he meant by [frns]...
may be...dictionary will have that shitty answer to it...
whenever i see him...
i will try my best to put on a smile to let him know that i m friendly...
nah...
may be that jus dont works...
haix...
onli if he could speak up....
i think things will be settle alrd....
may be we both jus needs time..
----[trying to forget u...]
-----[trying to make things fade off but jus selfishly wan to keep those memories....can i?]
And, life without DUMMY will be equal to the worst night mare...31'May'08
